i thought it was gonna be alright.. when i wrote the letter.. when i wrote the card.. telling you that i really want to wish you happiness.. i even ask you to cherish whoever the girl is.. yet, you never mention the letter or the card.. is it becuz you don't want to correct me?

i admit i am happy to receive your msg regarding the presents.. i am happy you call me by that name too.. i will only let you call that.. i really am happy.. but do you even know?
do you even know that i am crying bitterly over your msn nick now?
aren't you afraid i might ask you?
aren't you afraid of hurting me with that nick?
or.. have you been doing that on purpose to make me realise that there certainly is another person in your life.. and the person will never be me again? i know, i understand but i jus' can't accept it.. perhaps, i jus' don't want to.. why are you updating your nick every day? adding more words to your current nick.. i hope the girl is happy.. to be able to get your attention and love.. doesn't it hurt you that she's not feeling the same way as you? that's how i always feel..

what if, your nick doesn't imply to a girl but at some other things? den, it would have been stupid to cry over it..

i'm sorry for being so harsh to u when u tried to make me realise that he's not coming back..
i'm sorry that i said i don't want to talk to u..
i'm sorry for interrupting your outing with your frenz..
i'm sorry..
i really am..

thank u for listening to me these few days.. listening to me crying over the other line.. listening to me whining.. grumbling.. complaining.. even though u aren't free..

i thank da tou for talking to me even though she's on the phone with her mr. oblivious.. thank you for trying very hard to make me absorb what you say through my thick skull.. my stubborn nature.. my defense for him..


met up with colleagues of other departments to have a post and pre birthday celebration.. ate at fish and co.. it was my first time dining there and yet.. i only ordered soup & chips.. i was jus simply feeling full.. aww.. what a waSte..

as i hear their stories.. i hate to but they seems to be teaching about office politics.. is it true that one have to stuck up to their bosses to be promoted , to be recognised and to be known?

as i part with them.. part of me guess that they will speak about me when i'm not around.. becuz that's what happened to my other colleague! i don't know whether it was good or bad when they was talking about the colleague who left earlier.. so, does everyone do this at work? speak evil of everyone behind everyone's back? do i have to face this when i enter the working world?

i had an enjoyable day at sentosa on friday.. all thanks to you! :)) everything was kinda my first.. had to drop by at rasa to collect my pay.. wasn't much but was definitely contented.. becuz it was all CASH.. imagine da $$ i had in my wallet.. kaching kaching~

cable car.. for.. only.. $5.50!! (if you are a TAS student.. ^-^) i almost didnt get the offer becuz he doesnt know what's TAS.. oh goddd..~ anyway, it was a 2-way trip and jus normal cabin.. i'm afraid of heights.. therefore, i refuse to be seated in the glass cabin.. however, i got the glass cabin while going out of sentosa.. muahahah.. lucky us.. becuz it was too crowded and they were jus about to close.. supposedly, the passengers who pay for the normal cabin will have to take the normal cabin.. but since there wasn't anyone taking the glass cabin.. they let us take it! aww.. lucky lucky~ too bad we din had a camera.. but i would recommend anyone to take the cable car in the afternoon rather than night.. we thought it might close earlier since it was raining heavily..

i almost wanted to hide my phone in the wardrobe.. i'm evil, i'm trying to escape from your messages.. i don't want to hear any more from you.. go awayyyy.. stop telling me about how pitiful i have become.. i know.. i'm jus trying to get attention.. get lost! =X

i enjoyed the stroll along the beach too.. i wish that i get to stay at the island all day long.. i really need a break from life i guess.. can i take AL (annual leave) from life too?

musical fountain.. ohwell, i reckon that everything went well that night.. but sadly, it's only for that night.. expect that heavy rain..

i'm desperate in wanting to forget him.. but i aint using you to do that.. and i never will.. but i am afraid that i might have been doing that unintentionally.. without knowing..

you are going away for a week.. i know i will miss you.. but i really have no idea what kind of miss is that.. what do i treat you as? i know it took you lots of courage to ask me whether i will you miss and that you will miss me alot.. i was quite taken aback when you said that.. i thought i might faint.. but lately, i haven been wanting to tok to you much.. i don't know how to tell you that i'm hurting badly inside.. all those smiles aren't real.. they don't last.. what would you do then? leave me alone or walk me through?

my fairy tale will not happen.. yet..
i know someday it will..

i thank all of you for reading my entry.. for showing support and care to me.. i know that others might dislike me for writing about my past relationship.. after all, it's from my side only.. it's ok.. i don't blame you..

thank you, xiaopigu.. for reading my entry.. hope to see ya in the lift.. haha..

thank you, anon.. for listening to my never ending stories.. for almost 1 and a half yr.. for being there for me when i cry.. thank you.. i am grateful that you still care.. i know you have tried hard enough.. i know you are tired of hearing my stories or me crying on the phone.. i hope that soon, life will be back to normal again.. i jus need time, my dear fren.. please don't forsake me.. even if you do.. i understand why too..

thank you, emilyn.. for tagging ya.. thanks for caring! i wish i cld stayed too.. :S

thank you, xiao tou.. for your support! teehee.. yeahhh.. i will be stronger~ i will exercise more!! hahaha.. i really need to lose weight lo.. one auntie say i fat le.. -.-"

thank you, princess peipei.. for.. sharing a little love w me.. even though your other significant half gets more.. hAhaha.. i'm contented laa.. hope nothing's wrong alright? love me more! ;p

thank you, pingping.. for msgin me in the night and showing concern.. i hope u're ok and feeling better too.. love ya too!


busy.. busy.. busy..
i just want to be busy!